Sorry I haven't been keeping up with my usual updates, but I've been so frustrated at how the Mets have been playing that they've basically sucked the enjoyment and motivation out of me. After the team's fifth loss in their last six games, I needed to vent. The following was written in response to a friend, a Yankees fan, who compared my recent short fuse to the thinking of a Yankees fan:
I do have high expectations and demands this season. I so badly want to see them celebrate a championship at Shea before they tear it down.
But even then, it's not just the fact that they're losing. And you really can't understand unless you've been watching every game like I have. Every game is just so damn frustrating to watch. We can't get more than 2 hot hitters in the lineup at any given time. We leave so many runners on base without scoring, our offense can't do anything right. Beyond Pedro getting hurt in his first start, Maine and Perez are doing bad so far. Our bullpen is just horrendous, they've given up 3 grand slams already. And our manager seems to prove every day that he's an idiot.
Oh yeah, and there's still this collapse thing still fresh in our memories. We rightfully had some pretty high expectations last year, and we got our hopes crushed hard. This was supposed to be a fresh start, put all that behind us. But besides Johan, it's just been a continuation of that collapse.
The Mets got no-hit in 8 out of 9 innings tonight at home against the Braves. We still have to face Hudson and Smoltz, and the way we're playing, it's very likely we get swept.
I know it's still very early in the season, and too early to give up. But it is so unbelievably frustrating watching this team. I hate to have that mentality of the Yankees earlier this decade, but this is the third year in a row where we supposedly had the best team in the NL, and we're going nowhere but down. And I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel right now.
I already had bitterness at the start of the season between the collapse from the year before and it being the last year at Shea. And they are just playing so atrociously, it's making me sick.
This is obviously a much more negative side of me than I've been showing with my previous postings. Especially in regards to Willie Randolph, who I tend to give him the benefit of the doubt while everyone else blasts him, and that part of the rant was more of a reflection of the general consensus rather than my own beliefs, although it is getting harder to turn the other cheek.
But it is so hard to be optimistic right now. The last thing I want to be like is a Yankees fan, but this season means so much to me, and the signing of Johan Santana gave so much hope. I truly believed at the start of the season that the Mets were going to win the World Series this year. I was as optimistic as could be, especially considering the collapse of last year. But my optimism has been shattered.
All I can do is wait, and hope that we can turn this around before it's too late. I'm not going to give up. But I am panicking.